I surrender.

I’ve been digging through blogosphere since middle school. To be fair, I’ve been writing (and whining) since 3rd grade. It always has such a warm, sun-gleaming cute-flickering light filter everytime I mesmerize those times: innocent little girl was happily typing through Windows 98 in a whitish computer lab during an extracullicular activities called “Writing Class” (look how dorkly I was :p). That warming video filter still goes (though fading away exponentially) when I recall my time of blogging glory, where I met good pals, had writegasms, discovered cool things, and thoroughly entertained.

well, for the record, here they are.

sausanplanet.blog.com --> my first ever blog. cute huh.
sauthetroublemaker.blogspot.com --> a.k.a the just-reaches-puberty girl who try to be funny
kebumianzone.co.nr -->  the Geoscience blog that went so viral that it is adopted as the official site for Indonesian team and generate me a fanbase J

My brain is fuzzy right now. Uhh, sweet, sweet memories..

Now, here I am, the super duper busy university student of Geological Engineering. Wow. there are two emphasises on the phrase:

1. it is engineering. meaning = bye bye my ¾ portion of normal human free time
2. it is geology. meaning = bye bye my weekends with fieldtrips and my weekdays with non-stop lab work. Not to mention reports. and assignments. and fieldtrips.

Don’t get it wrong though. I love it.  I love being a future geologist wannabe. Geology is the one and only subject which satisfy both my science/tech fetish and my strongly visual, imaginative mind. Not to mention, it is most likely get well paid. Conclusion: It equals paradise.But, somehow something feels like missing. Almost three years without a casual article written a single time.. it does make my heart itch. Okay, okay, false. I did write a blog (containing a single post and never have make time to continue) back in 2011: saushine.wordpress.com

But really! I can’t count numerous occasions when there is a hidden screen in the back of my head, projecting about me conveniently sitting before my Dell laptop, casually typing my head (and heart) out into decent blog contents. Everytime I encountered cool daily stuff “bloggable”, that “blogging commercial” strikes again.Apart from all extensive writing I’ve done in the current university life (paper, paperworks, assignments, researches, reports, that other site I admin, a newsletter, even that abandoned blog)... lacking of the writing which is decently casual empties my soul. But, then again, I’ve got like 4 blogs already. Yet none of them survive to an acceptable period of active writing. Why?? Why, Sau?!!

Today, I’ve found the answer.

Probably, it is because I wanted it to be perfect.

Actually, another commercial always follows that other commercial running: that somehow my blog will be my financial lifesaver, or something super-original, super-famous masterpiece that will save me a place in heaven.While this is a good motivation, it also has its curse. I became a control freak. Yeah, each and every article has somehow to be written in a perfect way that promotes updateness, charm, wittiness, usefulness, or funninest needing to be taken care with extra polishing. Damn-extensive extra polishing. Or that I set myself an obligatory frequency of blogging, which is a total burden.

Now, just because my Google account is lacking of a personal blog.. why not writing again? J but this time, I surrender. I don’t care about impressing folks anymore. So, if you bear with me, you’ll see articles that is roughly a one-take only writings. With style that reflects me. Here is the mantra: live without bullshit.

 However, since I am an interesting person, you will be equally entertained anyway.  

Or not.

I don’t care :p

Thanks for reading!

SPOILER: I’ve just revisited saushine.wordpress.com, apparently every first post is a nostalgic one. Waaay more complete than this. Haha. Visit that one for details!